How long after you decided you wanted a divorce did it take you to tell your spouse?

I have ultimately decided that after trying and struggling for years to make things work that the best thing for my husband and I is to start our lives over apart. I love him and wish that things could work out between us but we have grown into two totally different people wanting two very different things out of life and nothing helps. I have been toying around with the idea of leaving for about a month now and I'm certain it's what I want to do. When it comes to telling him, I can't conjure up the nerve to do it. I know it's going to hurt both of us, and hurting him is something I can't fathom doing, but it is inevitable. I'm moving back to the United States and he will have to stay here in his homeland. That's the part that hurts the most. Knowing I won't be able to call him, or see him if needed later on. I know the point is to move on, but with our life it has to be so abrupt. Like I said, I love him and want things to work out, but we have tried everything and although we have a great relationship on the outside, inside I'm dying for something completely different than what is possible with us. I feel like I always make the wrong choices and if I were to leave, I would regret it, but how could that be if I am feeling this way?