Anorexic for 5 years and I can't get rid of biological problems like no appetite, getting full too fast...?

I have been anorexic since I was 15, I am now 20. I have made body peace and do my best with that but I can't get rid of the obsessive calorie counting, desire to always go to bed with negative calories, and eat what is 'healthy'. I have about 10 foods I eat now because I love eating healthy and I have heard that so many things are bad. I branch off from my 5 things if I have to, but even on a REALLY good day I can't get myself to eat more than 1500 calories. I have no desire to eat, and if I happen to get hungry (rare occasion) I get full quickly to where it feels like I'm just going to throw up. I try to take advantage of the good days and I understand that at my weight and having a high metabolism I can eat whatever I want and not exercise as long as I don't eat over 2000 calories, but I can't even fathom consuming that much food! I don't know how to undo the bad list. There is help where I live, a specialized nutritionalist, but I cannot afford the help. I honestly like how I live and have lost hope that I will ever be without this. I have been this way so long that it is a part of me and I can't imagine anything different. I am only on here posting this for my boyfriend, and because the stories of anorexics breaking bones just by moving scares me to death. Is there hope? Can anyone help me?